Last Updated: June 27, 2024
Letโs get real. You probably donโt need beer socks, a burrito blanket, or a taxidermy deer head in your day-to-day activities.
I donโt think it comes as a surprise, but AliExpress is a giant marketplace. There are tons of good/normal products likeย electronics,ย clothingย andย home decorย items.
The beauty of AliExpress is that it has a ton of odd things, and it is known for its cheap prices. This E-commerce platform doesnโt produce its own products, and instead it relies on independent small businesses in China and South-East Asia.
And since there are a lot of sellers, and listing prices are significantly lower than on places like, say, Amazon, and the warehousing in most cases is handled by the sellers, there are things that you are less likely to find anywhere else.
But, as in every family and in every city, there is a strange side to it.ย What are the weirdest things on AliExpress that you can buy? Letโs find out!
You probably donโt need a Squidward doormat, a bob wig for your dog, or a whack-a-mole hanger for your day-to-day activities.
But, after all, why shouldnโt you have them?
WEIRD ALIEXPRESS PRODUCTS
Whack-a-mole hanger
Price: $3
A hanger for keys/reusable face masks/light jackets/anything else, where a groundhog pops up while itโs in use.
I have one for my dogโs leash, and itโs amazing. There are squirrels, cats, bears and ladybug options available ๐
Chicken clutch
Price: $17.50
A handbag shaped as a chicken. Itโs actually functional, even despite how it looks.
Comes with a strap and can also be used as a shoulder bag.
How it has over a 1,000+ orders, is beyond me.
Desiccant pouch bag
Price: $7
Everyone loves those weird pouches you find in the toe of your new shoes, so why not use one as a phone carried with this simulated desiccant bag.
All of the fashion of a desiccant pouch, now with added pockets!
Flaming Hot Throw Blanket
Price: $9+
This is either a way to keep your virginity, or instantly lose it to a person with a very weird amazing taste.
Gear shifter hoodie
Price: $1.75
I bet you never worried about your gear shifter being cold and lonely in your car at night, you heartless monster!
I hope thatโs about to change, when you see this glorious item.
10,000+ orders and counting!
โMAKE IT RAINโ Money pistol
Price: $13
A perfect metaphor of what it feels like shopping on AliExpress, especially during the 11.11 sale.
Beer socks
Price: $7
You donโt have to be a beer enthusiast to appreciate these socks, but it definitely helps.
This listing has a few other designs that are and are not beer-related.
Burrito blanket
Price: $11+
If you have a toddler, or if you identify as a burrito (donโt we all on Monday mornings), this pita blanket will bring you one step closer to help your outer self reflect your inner world.
Fun fact: โburritoโ means โlittle donkeyโ in Spanish. Which is what you would feel like, if you donโt subscribe to our weekly product newsletter.
Ducks With Helmets
Price: $2
Everyone needs a travel buddy, and there is no cuter travel buddy than this car duck, who will happily go with you to work or across the country without complaint.
Even better, safety is at the forefront of Car Duckโs mind, as he has a collection of adorable helmets.
These cabinet handles
Price: $2.75
One manโs โcreepyโ is another manโs classy.
I have to admit, I am very tempted.
Dog bob wig
Price: $4.50
Ok, I donโt really know what to say about this, but it seems to me that a description is not really required.
โBanksyโ figurines
Price: $12+
Resin-made figurines of Banksy paintings. They are hand-painted, and there are 10 different options.
Whether you are a into art or not, people would be marveling at how creative at decorating your own living space with style you are.
Turkey hat
Price: $4
Every Thanksgiving used to be ruined by awkward small talk with extended family that ended in a knock-down, drag-out fight. It was a fact of nature, like โwhat goes up must come downโ, or that construction workers catcall anything with a pulse that walks past them.
Not anymore. With this turkey hat, everyone at Thanksgiving dinner will be too distracted by the thing on your head to notice their differences in political opinions.
TAXIDERMY DEER TROPHY (itโs vegan!)
Price: $35
Definitely in poor taste.
However, no deer were harmed in the process โ itโs made out of resin, and the only suffering creatures are the ones who are going to have to look at it.
PIG PILLOW
Price: $12+ (depending on size)
Pigs are cute, cuddly, and make delicious bacon.
If you need a little more pig in your life (but not enough to text your ex-boyfriend, Brian), then this sleeping pig plush pillow is the perfect sleeping companion.
AVOCADO PHONE CASE + SOCKET
Price: $2.23
iPhone cases with avocados on them that have an avocado pop socket. What not to like?
Unless you donโt like the color green, or avocadoes, in which case there is a lemon, peach, watermelon and a strawberry designs. Youโve got to like at least one of those, right?
REAL GHILLIE SUIT
Price: $46
Weird factor? 10/10
Functionality? Also 10/10.
I mean, itโs a fully functioning ghillie suit. Scare your neighbours? Check. Hunt? Check. Blend in with the rest of the weird stuff you bought? Probably also check.
Might be best to stay away further from the campfire. With how warm it will keep you, it shouldnโt be a problem.
Goose socks
Price: $2.70
Quack!
Another funny AliExpress item: socks that look like a goose head.
GLASS TEA INFUSER WITH A CORK PLUG
Price: $1.81
A stylish tea infuser.
I think the glass ones are better than the metal (glass doesnโt get oxidized and there is less doubts of what material it is), and it also looks better IMO.
The diameter is 1โณ so it shouldnโt be that hard to clean it.
AUX PHONE ATTACHMENT
Price: $5
Plug this bad boy into your phoneโs speaker outlet and instantly be transported back to a simpler time, where people did not have equal rights, financial instability plagued the Earth, and phones were wiredโฆ
All those things are still happening except for wired phones? Oh. Wellโฆ have fun with a wired phone!
SAFETY VEST FOR YOUR CHICKEN
Price: $4.60
A high-vis vest for your chickens. This way they are going to be safe crossing the road.
AND A HELMET (SAFETY FIRST!)
Price: $2
And for the most hot-headed chickens, a helmet will be necessary.