But, as in every family and in every city, there is a strange side to it. What are the weirdest things on AliExpress that you can buy? Let’s find out!
1. “Breaking Bad” Dog Raincoat
Have you ever thought “Maybe my dog doesn’t like getting absolutely soaked to the bone” while taking it for a nude walk in a monsoon while you bundle under 15 layers of waterproof clothing?
If yes, this coat is for you (and more specifically, your dog).
2. Sleeping Pig Pillow
Price: from $10.99
Pigs are cute, cuddly, and make delicious bacon. If you need a little more pig in your life (but not enough to text your ex-boyfriend, Brian), then this sleeping pig plush pillow is the perfect sleeping companion.
3. Turkey Hat
Price: $1.57 + shipping
Every Thanksgiving used to be ruined by awkward small talk with extended family that ended in a knock-down, drag-out fight. It was a fact of nature, like ‘what goes up must come down’, or that construction workers catcall anything with a pulse that walks past them.
Not anymore. With this turkey hat, everyone at Thanksgiving dinner will be too distracted by the thing on your head to notice their differences in political opinions.
4. Instant Noodle Blanket
Price: from $12.58
Instant noodles fill you with warmth, happiness, and a fullness that you could describe as “alarming”.
You’ll get those same feelings with this instant noodle blanket, and better yet, it shares a real instant noodle’s nutritional value.
5. Troll Doll Lighter Case
A man jumps out at you in a darkened alley, knife in hand. He demands your wallet. Shaking, you reach down to grab it, shuffling things around in your pocket.
Screaming, the man points at your hand before running for his life. In your hand is a small, terrifying doll, with a flame erupting from its head.
Never get mugged again with this Troll Doll lighter case!
6. Retro Mic Speaker Phone
Plug this bad boy into your phone’s speaker outlet and instantly be transported back to a simpler time, where people did not have equal rights, financial instability plagued the Earth, and phones were wired…
All those things are still happening except for wired phones? Oh. Well… have fun with a wired phone!
7. Lettuce Flip Flops
Price: from $6.82
Have you ever bitten into a crunchy Caesar salad and thought… This lettuce is good, but it would be even better if it were used as a protective piece of footwear that I could wear on warm summer days?
If you have thought that, these flip flops are perfect for you.
8. Simulated Desiccant Bag
Everyone loves those weird pouches you find in the toe of your new shoes, so why not use one as a phone carried with this simulated desiccant bag.
All of the fashion of a desiccant pouch, now with added pockets!
9. Moxibustion Massage box
What do you when you have a stiff back, but also want to cosplay a Lego brick?
Here is the perfect device for relaxing and getting a warm and pleasant massage without breaking the bank, while looking like you’d cause excruciating pain to whoever dares to step on you!
With the Moxibustion massage box, you can target different areas that are sore and focus on the spots that you need to relax and heal the most.
10. Car Duck with a Helmet
Everyone needs a travel buddy, and there is no cuter travel buddy than this car duck, who will happily go with you to work or across the country without complaint.
Even better, safety is at the forefront of Car Duck’s mind, as he has a collection of adorable helmets.
11. Toilet Paper Earrings
Toilet paper has taken on a whole new meaning this last year, and what better way to commemorate it than to wear it as a pair of earrings!
With these toilet paper earrings, you’ll let everyone know what you’re thinking: finding more toilet paper before middle-aged soccer moms hoard it.
12. KN-95 Face Mask Handbag
Nobody has had a bigger glow-up in 2020 than the facemask. They went from something only doctors and dentists wore to a global icon of fashion.
Now, bring that fashion to the next level with this facemask handbag.