25 Geeky things that you saw online but didn’t know where to buy – Vol. 15

This is a new part of the geeky things from AliExpress. Today we are going to see the some mind blowing, highly innovative and some very useless geeky gadgets, starting with colored smoke cakes for posh photo-ops, colored fire sachets that you can get at some gas stations in the outskirts of small towns, to the models of magic wands and pirate ships and stuff. 


The first item today is a colored smoke prop that people love to use in various music videos and during the wedding photoshoots. Our local stores sell them for $10 and more, and on AliExpress you can get them for half that, including the shipping cost. There is 8 different color options in the listing.


The next item is a colored fire sachet. You drop the whole packet in the fire, and in a matter of a few seconds once the packaging burns the color of the fire starts evolving. You can change the boring regular fire into something that looks like this, or even something like this because I don’t have the actual footage of the product in use, with very interesting shades of green, blue and purple. The smoke cake, which is what the seller calls it, burns for about 30 to 60 seconds, and it can be broken in several pieces.


So now we are moving to the more peculiar things. Here is a conductive ink pen. The idea here is that the ink helps electricity move. These pens can be used for repairing or adding traces to existing circuit boards on metal, glass, plastic, or epoxy. The ink remains in liquid form until placed on a porous surface at which point it dries and becomes able to conduct electricity. The ink holds up under folding, so you can draw a circuit, fold the paper up, and later unfold to find the circuit still works.


Here we have a fully functional strandbeest miniature. Just like when my girlfriend wants me to do something for her, you need to blow it, i mean on it for it to function. The full sized ones are quite majestic. For the extra excitement you need to assemble this one yourself, which takes time, but it doesn’t seem too complicated.


A medium-sized digital telescope to look at the big things from far away, like your mom rolling back from her favourite ice-cream shop. Can also be used for bird-watching, wink wink, you dirty perverts.


Puzzle versions of Renaissance paintings. Putting one together might be almost just as hard as painting a real one. I can't remember the last time I actually finished a puzzle, but I remember that there was always a few pieces missing. They should make a 1000 piece puzzle which when you finish it says “go outside”.


Is it a wasp? Is it a bee? What could it bee? This model that comes disassembled in 236 pieces, a 3D puzzle of sorts. The pieces are compatible with the famous constructor the name of which shall remain unspoken. There is a ton of other different ones in the related products.


The next thing is something that we have previously seen in the useless things video – this piggy bank, which upon the push of the button grabs your coin. I have one of these, and it is hilarious. I have the panda one, and there are options for cat lovers as well.


Telescopic claw aka buttscratcher. Can also be used to grab things that are within the close proximity – 55 cm, or about 2 feet is the length of the said device. Useless, but fun. Unless you are a human-sized T-Rex, in which case it would be super useful.


An emergency credit-card sized light that can be carried around in your wallet. There is a battery inside which powers a small energy-efficient LED that lights up when you lift the bulb. The light is reusable, which means it stops working when you fold it.


These fish slippers, or should I say … fish flops. I have bought a pair for the summer. They would go well with my Pepe flight mask to make sure wrong types of people don’t talk to me.



Spirograph is a geometric drawing toy that produces mathematical roulette curves of the variety technically known as hypotrochoids and epitrochoids. Using it as you can see here is very simple, and for the amount of money that it costs it is a very fair price for the amount of entertainment you get out of it.

DIY HEART MODEL (Not an actual heart)

A DIY assemblable and anatomically correct heart model. It can make a very lame gift for a school-aged kid in a futile attempt to get them into science. I think that the bee model from earlier is much cooler.


Game Over cup

Game Over mug for the most hardcore gamers so that you can feel like you are holding a controller even when you are away from your favourite console. It seems impractical from the storage point of view, but very practical from the aesthetical one.


tetris iphone case

Yo dawg. We heard you like retro videogames so we put a retro video game console in your videogame console. Here we have a functional tetris case for iPhones to have something to play with when your phone battery dies.


A candy holder thing, in case, you know, you get tired of eating your candy. I thought it would at least spin it for you, but it just holds it. The reason it has so many orders is puzzling to me, but I found it going through the orders that you make, and thought that if at least a few of you bought it, some others may find it interesting as well.


Ctrl-Alt-Del cups. Supposedly made out of thin plastic so it’s not really recommended to drink very hot drinks from them and taking a picture with hot tea in them seems like a bit of a shady move on the sellers part. But I like how they look anyway and they can totally be used for snacks and salads and other cold food.


Alien plush – chestburster version. Can be used as a part of a sweet Halloween costume, or a very unusual pregnancy announcement photo op. Interestingly enough, it’s far from the oddest plushie that I have seen on AliExpress.


Skull bottle. So these are the bottles that Skull vodka is sold in. I have gifted one to my dad a while ago, and for some reason I have another one in my house. I can’t remember buying it off Ali, and I can’t remember being irresponsible enough with my spending to buy a $50 bottle of vodka. If you are the same, or if you are not of a legal drinking age in your country, you can just buy the bottle on its own.


Galaxy necklaces like this constantly make their way into the top selling products. There are more basic versions, with just one planet per necklace, here we have X. You may have noticed that Pluto isn’t there, because, possibly due to the recent work of Jerry Smith.

WANDS STORE (NOT owned by Mr. Ollivander)

Magic wands store – there are a lot of different ones in that store that are quite accurate to what has been shown in the movies. There is one for nearly every more-less important character.


Black pearl, it looks just beautiful. The price is quite high though.


A butt cushion. As a geek, or as an office professional, you might be spending too much time on your posterior. Sedentary lifestyle is taking over our lives, and I hope you stand up and walk around at least once every hour. But if you sit a lot, you can minimize the damage to your spine, and do so in more comfort.

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  1. Denim Jacket 3rd July 10, 2019 at 3:39 pm

    Fun list. Although that chestburster is just so weird to me. And 400 bucks for the black pearl? That movie wasn’t that good.

    1. Admin July 11, 2019 at 12:42 pm

      Thanks! I feel like the first part was alright, but it really went downwards from there


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